myerstownherald.com

By MOLLY DAVIS
Valentine’s Day is right around the corner.
I won’t be making a pit stop at that juncture — I’ll walk, no I’ll sprint — right past that stupid holiday.
To me, it’s just a female version of the “mine is bigger than yours” contest in which men always engage.
But women are more subtle about it.
No harsh words, no fists – just backhanded “compliments” and smiles that don’t reach the eyes (AKA smirks).
One example?
“Your flowers are sooooo pretty,” says one co-worker to another. “MY boyfriend got me two dozen exotic flowers that had to be flown in from the end of the earth where they only bloom once every 27 years. But your roses are nice, too.”
It kind of sounds like a compliment to the untrained ear.
Far from it.
Mean girl translation:
My significant other loves me more, makes more money, is better than yours, so HA!
It’s a competition where she who gets the biggest, most expensive gift wins.
But they don’t win.
To me, if you need Valentine’s Day to “show off” how much your man loves you to all the other girls, then insecurity plays an important role in your relationship, so you lose.
Not that I don’t enjoy receiving gifts — I do — but if a man can only show his appreciation for me because the calender shames him into it one day a year, then I’ll pass.
Plus, flowers wilt, and I don’t like chocolate, so it’s just as well I don’t celebrate the holiday.
I’ve always felt this way — I didn’t acquire this attitude by being ignored one-to-many Valentine’s in the past.
Which, by the way, I have been.
I associate it with extreme pressure.
Who hasn’t heard these gems from women:
“He better get me a dozen roses or we’re through!”
“My husband sent me flowers at home. At home! Can you believe it? I wanted them to come to work so I could put them on my desk for everyone to see!”
“He got me pink roses. Not red, but pink.”
It’s hard to satisfy females on a normal day.
Throw in the pressure of this holiday, and even the nicest, well meaning of men will fall short.
Unless you get a stable, non-materialistic woman.
And they’re like unicorns.