myerstownherald.com

By MOLLY DAVIS
To defriend or not to defriend?
That is the Facebook question.
One I was faced with last week, after I was dumped.
By the guy who I met on Facebook.

Humiliating?
Absolutely.
After dating for a while, I got the “Dear John” message.
What was said is not important.
What is important is that it’s over.
And now that our “real” relationship is finished, I was faced with the dilemma of ending our virtual connection, which is how we connected in the beginning.
Sound stupid?
It is.
But realistic.
If I don’t de-friend him, we still have access to each other’s lives.
Pictures, status updates — intimate details I’m not sure I want to know or want him to know.
Now, if I was not a curious person, I would keep him on as one of my 500 or so “friends.”
But I am curious.
And I would totally stalk his page.
Just being honest.
What if he started dating someone else — which he will — and I have to see pictures?
What if he de-friends me first?
If I defriend him, and I have the impulse to check out what’s going on in his Facebook world, then I can’t.
Removing him removes my crazy options.
But, if I keep him, then I leave open that door — just in case he decides to contact me via the social site.
Options still open.
Not a good argument — if he wants to get in touch, he has my phone number.
It’s immature, and I own up to that.
I’m not one of those people that stays friends with their previous relationships.
I have enough friends — and I firmly believe that someone always has an ulterior motive for remaining in contact with an ex.
Someone had to end it — and the other half holds out hope that there will be a reconciliation.
That other half would be me.
Better to cut it off completely.
Or, I could post great pictures, talk about my awesome weekends, and let everyone know how amazing my life is.
Sad thing is, he is not even giving this facebook thing a thought.
I’m sure my crazy thoughts wouldn’t even enter his head — guys operate on a completely different level.
They’re so lucky.
Most men deal with their emotional sides in a completely different manner…
Rationally.
They seem to go on with their everyday activities without even a speedbump.
While I feel like I’m driving on a pothole-filed road on a 10-speed Schwinn.
I’m not an idiot — I know it’s easier because it was his choice.
And if it had been the other way around, I probably wouldn’t even hit a speedbump.
Because it would’ve been my choice.
Speaking of decisions…
Defriend.
And block.