By MOLLY DAVIS
Kate Gosselin plus her tamer mullet have taken their media blitz to another level.
Another fashion disaster, the wrinkly suspender-wearing goofball Larry King, challenged Kate to answer a round of not-so-challenging questions.
Which she dodged.
Larry lobbed easy ones at her left and right — and she tap danced and skirted her way around all of them.
Looking tense and like she was suffering from lock jaw, Kate did her best to avoid bad-mouthing her previous better half on “Larry King Live” Tuesday night.
It looked like she was in actual physical pain.
She said she and Jon had a “peaceful custody” arrangement and admitted, “My nature is to freak out, to be in control.”
A “good thing?”
Kate, come back to earth.
There is no up side to being a complete control freak.
It has alienated you from your family and cost you a husband.
Not to mention your “fans.”
Good ol’ Larry isn’t the most thorough interviewer, but he did prod Kate to say that the dissolution of her marriage has been “a good experience” and that TLC “has the editing rights” to the show and she has zero to do with the final product.
Keep blaming TLC Kate — it’s done wonders for you so far.
I LOL’ed when she said she “has big dreams” and “is very driven.”
She has dreams?
I have dreams for her as well.
They involve her shutting that big mouth and taking care of her 8 kids.
And not driving everyone else around you insane during the process.
August 27, 2009
KATE DODGES LARRY’S SOFTBALL QUESTIONS
JONAS JERK TRIES TO RIDE TAYLOR’S COATTAILS
By MOLLY DAVIS
It’s being reported that Joe Jonas has been tapped to appear in the upcoming “Valentine’s Day” movie.
With Taylor Swift.
Why, why, why?
This is the worst casting call ever.
Ever.
For one thing, he cannot act.
I had the displeasure of seeing his “movie,” where he is terrible at playing himself, and can categorically say he should stick to whining tweeny lyrics.
If he can’t even be convincing as himself, how can he channel a completely different persona?
He can’t.
Period.
Jonas cannot hold his own in this extremely A-List movie, which stars actors like Julia Roberts, Bradley Cooper, Queen Latifah, Taylor Lautner and Swift.
It’s being released February 10, 2010.
The other glaring fact is King Dork Joe Jonas wants in on Taylor’s success.
Stop trying to ride her coattails, you skinny-jean wearing, bushy-eyebrowed creep.
Your 15 minutes was up long ago, and Taylor has moved past your over-the-phone breakup.
Her career has skyrocketed, and you are not even a speck in her rear view mirror.
Hopefully, Jonas’ role will be the briefest cameo and Taylor won’t have to share her well-deserved screen time with him.
He doesn’t deserve to be in Swift’s make-believe life any more than her real one.
OUR VIEW: KENNEDY’S DEATH CAN’T ALTER DEBATE
The death of Sen. Ted Kennedy should not be used to help pass a health-care bill. We mourn Sen. Kennedy’s passing. But the debate over health care should be resolved by logically looking at what is contained in any bill that Congress considers, not by emotionalism.
Kennedy dedicated many years of his career to advocating universal health care. Under such a system, the government apparently would run the health-care system. This plan would be costly and should be avoided.
But a type of universal coverage has been a centerpiece of President Obama’s recent efforts to change health care. Only after intense public opposition at town halls and in the polls did Obama appear to back off of a demand for a public insurance option. No one should be fooled, though. Obama likely still wants a public option, and he likely is looking for a catalyst to get the public on his side. Obama might try to use Kennedy’s legacy as a plea to help his health-care plan pass.
Instead, the public opposition to Obama’s plans must continue. The vehemence of the public’s rejection of a government takeover of the health-care system already appears to have taken the Obama administration aback. The people are winning this battle, and they should not change their minds now.
What people should remain focused on in the coming weeks is cost. A health-care plan would add billions to the deficit. A ballooning deficit and debt, which will run into the trillions, should provide a warning against big government spending and the need for continuing opposition to Obama’s health-care plan. Although the government has never gone bankrupt, the limits are being pushed.
The other major concern is inflation. With the government spending so much money it does not have, more money has to be introduced into the economy, which increases the risk that prices will go up. If anything, the government should tighten its belt.
To solve the current economic crisis, instead of expanding government, costly programs should be trimmed and the printing of more money should be halted. The stimulus bill should be repealed, and no more cash giveaways should be created. All of this government money brings short-term jolts but no long-term fixes.
To restore long-term economic growth, the deficit must be eliminated, which is the opposite direction from where Obama is headed. The first major way to stop the expansion of government can be to defeat Obama’s costly and ineffective plans to reform health care. The people must continue to make their voices heard in opposition.
WHAT DIDN’T HAPPEN THIS SUMMER
By ERIC FISHER
The summer of 2009, nearing its end, has been notable as much for what didn’t happen as for what did happen. Tiger Woods didn’t win a major. Lance Armstrong didn’t win the Tour de France. Roy Halladay wasn’t traded. Brett Favre didn’t end his retirement and sign with the Minnesota …
Well, we’ve got to scratch that last item about Favre, but you get the idea. Many of the major stories this summer were about things that didn’t happen. In fact, all of golf’s major tournaments were as much about who didn’t win as who did win.
As we wrap up the “Summer of Non-Events,” the following is a list of some other things that didn’t happen.
Eagles offensive lineman Shawn Andrews didn’t make it to the practice field during the entire training camp at Lehigh University. Andrews, making the move from guard to tackle, injured his back during the camp’s opening-day run, then never showed his face again.
The Phillies didn’t have to give up rookie of the year candidate J.A. Happ or any of their top prospects to acquire former Cy Young Award winner Cliff Lee and outfielder Ben Francisco.
Cliff Lee didn’t lose a game as a Phillie.
Cliff Lee didn’t give up more than one earned run in his five starts as a Phillie.
There weren’t any challengers for horse racing’s Triple Crown.
Most of America didn’t notice that there weren’t any challengers for horse racing’s Triple Crown.
Carl Edwards didn’t win a race. The preseason choice of many, including me, to oust Jimmie Johnson from NASCAR’s championship throne, Edwards has not won a race all year.
Nobody called a sports talk station to discuss the 76ers.
Penn State didn’t have a competition to be the starting quarterback.
Eagles head coach Andy Reid didn’t announce that middle linebacker Stewart Bradley’s knee injury was a season-ending ACL tear because he was perturbed that reporters did their jobs and tried to find out the severity of the injury before King Andy read the official proclamation.
The Arena Football League didn’t survive.
The Baseball All-Star Game didn’t end in a tie.
Two preseason voters in The Associated Press preseason college football poll didn’t vote for Florida as No. 1.
South Carolina head football coach Steve Spurrier didn’t vote for Florida’s Tim Tebow, the leading Heisman Trophy candidate, as the preseason all-SEC team quarterback.
Point guard Andre Miller, arguably the team’s most valuable player the past two seasons, did not re-sign with the 76ers.
Barry Bonds didn’t sign with a Major League team, even though plenty of them, especially the San Francisco Giants, could use another big bat in their lineup.
Eagles president Joe Banner didn’t really say that the Eagles have the best roster in the NFL, did he?
The Eagles didn’t really sign Michael Vick, did they?
Charles Barkley didn’t mince words when asked his opinion.
Charles Barkley didn’t mince words when nobody asked his opinion.
Charles Barkley didn’t improve his golf game.
The New York Mets didn’t get any better.
Phillies fans and broadcasters didn’t miss any opportunity to point out the Mets’ failures.
The Pittsburgh Pirates didn’t have a winning record – unless they play incredible baseball in September and climb back to .500 – for the 17th consecutive season, breaking the record they shared with the Phillies (1933-48) for the most consecutive losing seasons by a North American professional sports franchise.
Danica Patrick didn’t win a race. But that didn’t prevent her from being far and away the most visible Indy Car driver in the United States.
Boxing didn’t make the slightest dent in the consciousness of the average sports fan.
Mike Tyson didn’t get arrested (as far as we know).
Phillies pitcher Brett Myers didn’t sustain an injury in the vicinity of his left eye while having a catch with his son, as he originally told the Phillies.
Brett Myers didn’t mention that he sustained the injury on the same night he had been in a bar where a friend of his got into an altercation.
Brett Myers didn’t tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
The Eagles’ projected starting offensive line didn’t take one snap together, not even in practice.
Nobody wrote a column or started a Web site calling on Joe Paterno to retire.
August 21, 2009
JON & KATE PLUS POLICE
By MOLLY DAVIS
Jon and Kate have added some hate into the mix.
In a not-so-surprising turn of events, the police were called to the Gosselin’s Wernersville residence on Aug. 13.
Kate called the popo after she “showed up at the house unexpectedly. It’s Jon’s scheduled time to be there with the kids,” a source told TMZ.
Sources close to Jon and Kate told TMZ that Kate was upset because Jon wanted to leave the kids with Stephanie Santoro — the babysitter who was hired by Jon.
It appears that Kate has some, um, trust issues with the 23-year-old nanny, and doesn’t want her playing “mommy” with her kids.
So Kate went to the house to be watch the kids instead of Santoro — and that ignited the heated fight that ended with Kate dialing 911.
No arrests were made, and Kate checked in to a local Days Inn for the night — wearing sunglasses.
At night.
Which is where she should have been anyway, since they have an agreement about who stays at the house and when.
This story could have been more “Jerry Spinger-esque” if there was a Red Roof Inn and bodyguard Steve thrown into the mix.
Dare to dream.
This is just another example of Kate thinking the rules apply to everyone else but her.
If she had been locked up, at least she’d look good, because jailhouse orange is her hue, as she was seen looking hot in a bikini of the same color family this summer.
And I’m still on Team Jon.
Kate Gosselin’s second appearance on morning TV solidified Jon as the frontrunner again this week.
On “Live with Regis & Kelly” last week, Kate and her reverse mullet tried once again to make people see her “side.”
And as Regis quickly found out, when Kate wants your opinion, she’ll give it to you.
“I just have a feeling like, I think the separation is going to come to an end, I think he’s going to come back and he’s gonna say ‘Please, marry me again,’ and I think you’re going to live happily ever after,” Philbin said. “What do you think of that?”
Kate looked at him with the same disdain that is reserved for Jon.
“Wow,” she replied with an uncomfortable laugh/combination sneer. “You’re an optimist.”
My definition of optimism?
That this whole debacle will soon be over.
I predict TLC will soon cancel “Jon and Kate Plus 8″ before the year end.
Why?
Ratings are down.
And the police being called to referee a domestic dispute is an embarrassment to a network that prides itself as a “family channel.”
As I write this, TLC execs are probably brainstorming behind closed doors about the show’s fate.
My crystal ball reads “cancelled.”
OUR VIEW: PROTESTERS RATTLE OBAMA
The strength of the town hall protesters was shown by the resulting confusion from the Obama administration over whether his health-care plan would include a government health insurance company. Obama previously had said such an entity must be included in any so-called health reform bill. Now Obama and Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius appeared to back off on the public option, at least temporarily.
The town hall protesters are the reason Obama does not know how to handle the possibility of government run insurance. The protesters vehemently opposed any such government takeover of the health-care system. Some of the most strident opposition happened right here in Lebanon, and Obama is taking notice.
The anger on the left shows how effective the protests are. Attempts to demonize the protesters have backfired. They are ordinary people who are concerned about the government spending trillions of dollars that it does not have. Their concern is not difficult to understand.
The Obama administration has not been able to combat the force of the protests. Obama made one attempt to counter the opposition by criticizing health-care “myths.”
But this spin should be ignored. The fact is that neither Obama nor anyone else knows exactly what this health-care bill will do. It is 1,000 pages, and contains provisions expanding government’s role in people’s lives in new ways. It is not a myth that this bill is a giant expansion of government, and it is not a myth that the Congressional Budget Office said it would cost $1 trillion. The protesters should not be dissuaded by Obama’s argument.
Even though they have been effective so far, the work of the protesters is not over. Since seeming to back away from the public option, Obama administration officials then appeared to reverse course when angry liberals said the public option must be included. Talk then surfaced that Democrats would try to pass a health-care bill without any Republican votes.
To prevent the re-introduction of the public option, protesters must stay after so-called moderate and conservative Democrats. These Democrats are from swing districts and try to play both sides of the fence by voting against big spending measures when their votes are not necessary to pass them, but not really trying to forestall them either. If these Democrats are really conservative, they must stop any public option from being introduced. To make sure these Democrats actually stick to their conservative principles, their voters must make their voices heard.
People also should not be fooled by talk of putting insurance co-ops in the bill as opposed to a public option. No one really knows how these co-ops would work at this point, and they could be just another way for the government to create a quasi-public insurance company. The Democrats might try to sneak co-ops into the final bill as a way to appease liberals and conservative Democrats. Voters should remind their elected representatives that they do not want these co-ops in the bill, either.
Overall, the protesters have changed the course of the health-care debate. The government during the last several decades has been spending an increasing amount of money. The Obama administration, though, has taken this level of spending to new heights. The voters have stood up and said they have had enough.
BIRDS GET INSURANCE WITH VICK
By ERIC FISHER
Who is Michael Vick? He’s an NFL quarterback, a man responsible for the torture and murder of numerous dogs and a human being asking for another chance.
What is Michael Vick? He’s a symbol, a risk and an insurance policy. Oh yeah, he’s also a Philadelphia Eagle.
The Vick signing shocked the football world. The Eagles pride themselves – or should “pride” be past tense? – on having players with character. They were one of the last teams anyone could imagine signing Vick.
The signing triggered a tsunami of opinion. Little of the heated discussion, however, concerned Vick’s value as a football player, so we’ll save that issue, including my theory that he’s an insurance policy, for later in this column. First, we’ll deal with Vick as a symbol.
Vick is a symbol of cruelty. He is a symbol of inhumane treatment of animals. He is a symbol of depraved and despicable behavior.
Why does signing Vick elicit these feelings and provoke so much outrage? Read the specifics of what was done to the dogs on his property. Look at pictures of the abused dogs. You’ll understand.
On the other hand, Vick is also a symbol of everyone who needs a second chance. He lost a fortune, spent time in prison and is saying all the right things.
The Eagles emphasized the notion of Vick symbolizing anyone seeking a chance for redemption during their news conference last Friday. The redemptive element was front and center as Eagles coach Andy Reid, former Colts coach Tony Dungy and Vick spoke to the media. Little was said about how Vick could help the Eagles on the field.
Vick’s potential on-field contributions were pushed even further into the background when Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie took center stage. During his riveting news conference, Lurie even said that the signing of Vick would not be judged by how many yards he gains, but rather by whether he becomes a valuable, productive member of society.
If Vick doesn’t become a productive member of society and take a proactive role in addressing animal abuse, Lure said, this signing will be judged as “a terrible mistake.”
Lurie, who spoke lovingly of his dogs – past and present – knows that signing Vick is a risk. A huge risk. The Eagles’ carefully crafted public image has already taken a tremendous hit. The public outcry and protests at the team’s practice facility must make Lurie uncomfortable.
Vick’s past actions are going to dog him – if you’ll excuse the expression – for the rest of his career. Now, Vick’s problems are the Eagles’ problems. That’s why signing Vick was such a huge risk.
What reward would be worth the risk of signing Vick? Some say there is no reward, not even a Super Bowl victory, great enough to justify this signing. Others are more forgiving, but are still waiting for a valid explanation.
Despite what Lurie and Reid have said, giving Vick an opportunity to redeem himself isn’t enough of a reward to justify this signing. I believe Lurie when he speaks about being agents of change, and, given Reid’s experience with his two sons’ legal troubles, I believe he’s sincere when he speaks about second chances.
But that can’t be the whole story. The Eagles aren’t in the business of helping people turn their lives around. They are in the business of winning championships. (Or, as cynics might point out, trying to win championships.)
Speculation has centered on Vick’s role in the wildcat formation. Quarterback Donovan McNabb said he wouldn’t mind Vick taking five or six snaps per game. He may also be valuable on two-point conversions.
Five or six snaps and a two-point conversion aren’t worth the risk of signing Vick. There must be another reason.
That’s why I think Vick is an insurance policy. My theory is that Reid realized the vaunted offensive line the Eagles assembled during the offseason isn’t going to be nearly as good as he had hoped.
When Reid put the organizational wheels in motion to sign Vick, one week before the actual signing, right tackle Shawn Andrews hadn’t practiced yet due to back problems and prized offseason acquisitions Stacy Andrews and Jason Peters had been limited by injuries. Then left guard Todd Herremans injured his foot. By the time the Eagles signed Vick, four of their five starting offensive lineman had questions marks of varying sizes.
A troubled or inconsistent offensive line makes it more likely that McNabb will get hurt. If McNabb gets hurt, would the Eagles replace him with a less mobile quarterback? No.
If McNabb sustains a serious injury, the best chance the Eagles have to salvage their season behind this offensive line would be to have a mobile quarterback. Regardless of what anyone says about the rest of his skills, nobody questions Vick’s mobility.
Vick is the Eagles’ insurance policy – an expensive one in terms of the Eagles’ public image – in case the offensive line falters and McNabb gets hurt.
This is simply a theory, of course. But, for me, it’s the only one that makes sense.
August 13, 2009
OUR VIEW: ‘OBAMACARE’ BASHERS ARE PATRIOTS
The people who went to the town hall meeting in Lebanon and grilled Sen. Arlen Specter on the health-care “reform” legislation should be commended. Their participation is part of a nationwide reaction to health-care proposals that appear to be both costly and lacking in any substantial benefits. The appearances of local residents and their tough questions hopefully will convince Congress that this health-care proposal is a bad idea.
President Obama and other supporters of health-care “reform,” most notably House Democratic leaders Nancy Pelosi and Steny Hoyer, have turned to attacking the protesters and their motives for showing up at these meetings. These attacks are misguided, however. The Democratic Party leaders only should be blaming themselves.
Democratic mismanagement is the main reason the health-care proposals are floundering right now. Obama tried to sell his health-care plan as a way to fight rising medical costs. Then the Congressional Budget Office, which is nonpartisan, said the health-care reform proposal would cost close to $1 trillion. This report basically destroyed the whole rationale for Obama’s plan, and he has never recovered.
Insuring the uninsured was another major reason Obama gave for his plan. But his proposal would not significantly affect this problem either. In fact, indications are that existing benefits, such as Medicare, would be reduced. Paying more money for fewer benefits does not make sense. Obama was thus 0-for-2 in trying to sell health-care legislation.
Additionally, people do not even know whether Obama supports the government running a public insurance company, and whether such a measure would bring socialized medicine to the United States. Obama has tried to dodge this question.
The way the bill has been handled by Congress has not been smooth either. Congress tried to pass a bill, which was more than 1,000 pages in the House, as quickly as possible. Congress did not seem interested in debate or even what was in the bill. They just wanted to do something, regardless of whether it would work or not. Obama himself did not delve into the specifics of the bill in his public appearances. Obama also has delegated producing a bill to Congress, and his message on health-care reform has been largely rudderless.
To their credit, average citizens across the country became fed up with this process. They constructively took their anger to these town hall meetings. Their reaction has been patriotic. If citizens do not agree with what their legislators are doing, the most appropriate course of action is to show up and challenge them.
The response of the legislators has been varied. Many of them seem perplexed. In his appearance in Lebanon, Specter seemed to lose his cool. But these legislators must realize that it is their job to withstand such criticism. If they are trying to push through a massive change to the health-care system with little debate, they should be yelled at.
The benefits and even the objective of the current plan seem to be murky even to the legislators themselves, and such a wide reaching piece of legislation should not be passed without legitimate debate.
DON’T WIG OUT OVER SCARY KATE COSTUME
By MOLLY DAVIS
I know what I’m dressing as for Halloween.
Kate Gosselin.
Costume Web sites are advertising the fabulously cockatoo wig just in time to look like the angry mom of eight.
It may be my scariest costume yet.
Here’s the web site’s description:
“Dubbed the ‘Eight is Too Much Adult Wig,’ the ’sleek and stylish’ hairpiece ‘will make people think you have eight children.’ It’s smooth and face-framing in the front with a short and puffy back that’s full of volume.”
I reached for my credit card faster than Kate can call her ex a moron.
And we all know, that’s pretty quick.
I may wear it all the time, depending on how it looks.
I would like to prove know-it-all Kate wrong, as she has been quoted as saying her hairstyle is “not going to work for everybody. I’ve seen people come through the book line with thin hair and (it) just won’t work.”
Oh Kate, you’re so right.
Not everyone can sport a do that looks like someone took a scissors to you in the dark while having a seizure.
But I ‘m up to the challenge.
Who’s to say I won’t look amazing?
The conversation “piece” is well worth the $14.99.
HEY KATE, STOP WHINING & RAISE YOUR KIDS
By MOLLY DAVIS
Kate minus Jon is making the PR rounds.
The mom of eight opened up to Meredith Vieira on “Today” Monday morning, telling her lopsided side of the story.
“My focus still is the health and well being of my children as well as myself,” said Gosselin in her first public interview since the couple announced the were divorcing.
What really scares me is Kate’s self-righteous streak, which is a mile wide.
I get the feeling that she will keep the show going, just to show America how she’s been “wronged,” or to skewer Jon every chance she gets.
Yes, Kate, we know what a great mother you claim to be despite Jon’s “bad judgment.”
But instead of proving your point, shouldn’t you try to be smart about the situation rather than right?
Wouldn’t that make you the great mom you proclaim to be?
While it was teased as an “emotional interview,” I saw an expressionless Kate trying to convert viewers to her side of the feud.
She lacked emotion, looked bored, and used the time to get in her always-less-than-subtle digs at Jon.
She said that Jon was “no longer the person she knew and married” and that she still wears her wedding ring “for the children.”
I had to rewind the Tivo when she said she was “hesitant to believe the rumors” about Jon’s cheating.
That’s a strange thing to say, and an odd way to say it.
It stands to reason that since she lived under the same roof with your husband, she’d have an inside track to his romantic life.
Turns out Kate was reading the tabloids like every other average Joe for her information.
The only thing I liked about the interview was her hair — it had been tamed a bit in the back – and looked less “cockatooish.”
Small blessings.
Kate also addressed the rumor about her and bodyguard, Steve Nield, saying there was “no affair. There never has been an affair. We are very good friends with him, his wife and his family.”
She said when she’s not around her children, she’s “in hiding from the paparazzi.”
If she really wanted to settle this privately why is she out of town doing PR?
She’s trying to drum up sympathy and is overexposed as it is.
Go back to Wernersville and work on your family.
